Can i start with a question? I mean, it’s probably the least educated way to start a good piece of writing, but you know, i’m a blogger. Do you expect anything fancy? Good. So, here’s my question: Edward or Jacob?
Wa wa wa. Just kidding. I hate Twilight. ( I’m so funny!) OK, before i loose your attention, i’ll cut to the chase.
I’ve recently been thinking about the concept of “pursuit”. Not of COPS or Happyness, but rather the concept of choosing or being chosen and what that communicates to people. Fret not, this is not a “pity the 24 and single gal” blog. While there might be an obvious connection between my lack of romantic material and these thoughts, it’s larger than that. The element of pursuit transcends romantic relationships. Do i need to convince you of that? Is it pretty straight forward. Pursuit, or the lack thereof, reflects a choice. And that choice reflects true intentions.
Wait for it....... ok!
You’re probably thinking of a relationship. A relationship in which you feel less than pursued or where you’ve perhaps dropped the ball. I have a list of both. Friends. Family. Significant others. It’s probably safe and simple to say that any healthy relationship is two-sided. Both parties must be mutually invested and show it. Duh! Right? If not, you get that stalker girl who’s overly obsessed with a guy who’s kinda interested. (I’ve been there.) A friend who’s hurt because someone said they would call, but they never did (Yup, been there too). Or a marriage that’s deteriorating because his pursuit is toward that of a hobby over his bride (I pray against this one). Let me give a less dramatic example. How about the frustration you feel when people just don’t come through like they said they would? Or when someone forgets something big? I think we can raise questions of pursuit. Are they (am I) choosing something else to purse? And why? While the deeper issues of these example might be more than that of just unequaled pursuit- I think it's rather central. The pursuit and reciprocation of it speaks clearly of the heart’s true desires. Do you or do you not really want what you’re pursuing? In your pursuit, what are you choosing? And in that choice, what is it over?
Here's an example. If Jason Mraz were sitting at the Starbucks in Victorville, I would, after asking a few blaring questions, go see him. In high speed pursuit, I would go find him. Why? Because I’d really like to meet him one day. While trivial, i think you get the point. My pursuit followed my desires. Even a handsome man, playing a guitar, wearing a fedora (like he always does when getting coffee at Starbucks) would get me in my car.
Jesus tells me that where my treasure is, there also my heart is. And i think it works just as well in reverse- where my heart is, there you’ll find my treasures. My Time. Money. Investments. Affections. Etc. Do you love your car? You’re probably spending your money on it. Are you spending time and money on a gal you’re interested in? You probably really like her. Do you keep your word? Then you probably value the person to whom you gave it. Do you want to get to know him? Then you probably care to spend your time with him. It’s kind of simple, eh?
Much easier said than done though, right? This strike my heart as deep as it probably does yours. And let me take a stab at why. Relationships are hard. We’ve been the ones on the hurting side. We’ve been let down and we know the back burner all too well. But, to be fair, the loved ones in our lives know it well too. The hardest part of relationships is making them work (put that in a quote book.). And doing so is taxing of time and energy and money and emotions. (But, if you’re married, you get a credit. Work that.)
Here's my exhortation. Let’s get intentional friends. It’s safest to hurt those who are closest. It’s easier to bend my word with a best friend than with a new acquaintance, as he probably won’t care if we meet next week. It’s simpler to avoid conflict and a hard conversation, as they know we’re still good. It’s a whole lot easier to settle for lukewarm affections, as she knows I still love her. However, these are the people, the ones who are closest to us, that need to know they are still chosen! These folks need to know that even though they are stuck with us, we still love them enough to pursue them.
By golly, let’s show some gumption and pursue the things that we care for! Pursue the people that we love! Your pursuit will communicate to them that you are choosing them! That you’re choosing them over comfort, or self-protection, or conflict or your pride. In the end, your pursuit communicates love in simply being chosen. If we need a man to look toward for example- set your eyes on Jesus. He came running after me. Snatched me from the world I chose over him, slaughtered the fattened calf, put a ring on my finger and threw me a party! In his pursuit he chose me. He set me apart and called me his own. That, my friends, communicates great love!
And THAT is how we should love the people in our lives.
